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Sunday, February 6, 2011

The Winter of Change!

Oh what a winter this has been!  I haven't taken the time to write much.  Life took over and pursued me rather steadily, so much so that I haven't had time to reflect. 

We moved...talk about life taking over.  The move itself captured much of October and November.  Christmas happened, like it does every year, but it always sort of surprises me, like I forget it's coming.  We have a love hate relationship, Christmas and I!  I also started a new job...it's a different type of job, the kind where you don't get paid.  I've never really had one of those before...I finally came to the conclusion, after working for (3) + months and only getting two weeks pay that perhaps it was not a job. 

What have I learned, trust your first instinct...I've been scammed once, and taken advantage of once...  I hate to call this last "sort of job" a scam.  I truly believe the company meant well, they just really sucked at business.  They were in a line of work they knew nothing about.  The business ran them, they didn't run the business.  I truly got scammed on my book deal, but I was in good company.  The head of the Democratic committee, for Indiana/Obama, and Mitch Daniels wife were taken down the road as well.  You know, I had this weird feeling on both accounts, the job and the publisher, the very first time I talked to either group...listen to your intuition because it's alway right.

I thought, you know it works both ways. If you are going to trust your instincts on the bad stuff then shouldn't you trust your instincts on the good stuff as well?  I had a dream back in May, about opening my own business.  I've decided to actually listen to my gut on this one, finally!  As I sat here working on a website yesterday I thought...you know when I was little I used to pretend that I ran a school, for the performing arts.  Now mind you I pretended a lot, I have numerous scenarios I could dish about...I also pretended to have a big horse show in my side yard, a big sales pen in the barn (I would sell very expensive race horses), I was a frontiersman sometimes in my woods, and Barbie...well I didn't use her as a fashion icon, no she was diving in the depths of the horse tank saving people.  Yeah, me and my imagination were best buds, and I still make frequents calls to chat..to remind myself of those special times.  Oh...getting back to the business...

"Stage Roots",  education with all of the drama...  Improv workshops for children, teens, adults, and the corporate world.  I have been a faithful believer in the creative, fostering a creative environment, especially for children.  Through play children develop socially, they learn to problem solve and communicate.  Improv is this wonderful world full of game play; game play free from judgement, and competition.  Try to "be good" or avoid "being bad" results in a serious loss of personal experience.  Children constantly seek that pat on the head, or they become passive due to past failures.  Passivity is a response to authority, a giving up of responsibilty.  Improv will help those who are passive to trust themselves and others to make decisions and take risks.  It taps into the intuitive, the intuitive is where the genius lives in all of us. 

I'm not going to give you the whole sales pitch on my improv classes...I will just send you to my website.  The point is this...my intution tells me that this is exactly what I need to do, start this business, and yet I question if I am worthy.  Why, why do we question ourselves.  I just met and worked with a woman who didn't know a thing about what she was doing, and yet she had (3) buildings, a transportation service, (7) office people that she couldn't pay, and a plethora of caregivers and billing the state for Medicaid.  Yet, she is fully determined to make it work...I believe she told me that she hopes to be making over $10,000.00 a month.  And a man who would have sold publishing to the Queen of England.  Yet I still question the validity of my choice...and I actually have taught improv for a number of years, direct musical theatre, and spent (9) years in education.  It's just funny how everyone approaches life.

Anyway...it has been a winter of change, and it's not over yet, the change or the winter.  I don't know I kind of like not knowing what's around the corner.  I don't like the whole being "poor" part, which I am right now.  But I do know that when we are comfortable we tend to rest on our laurels, afraid to lose that comfort, and when we have nothing to lose we are much more willing to take risks.  I'm about to see where risk takes me. 

Oh, and you know the first piece of furniture I plan to add to my office...when I get one...that's not in my house?  My orange chair...now there was a risk! 

Here we come February...

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